Vulnerability in co-creating and manifesting a Dream and Vision within Honor and LOVE.
Vulnerability in co-creating and manifesting a Dream and Vision within Honor and LOVE.
I did really good not breaking the bowl for this long but the vision still manifested this morning as I was unloading the dishwasher…Yes, it’s just a bowl and UGH, what’s the point of being able to see events before they happen to possibly make other choices to have them not happen and the experience still happens? Now I wonder what’s next? Meaning, I saw this experience ahead of time for a reason and when I find a vision manifests the next events are triggered. When I had the vision of this bowl breaking in it, I dropped it…Well I didn’t drop it a pan landed on it. So it did not manifest as exact because of course after having this vision of me dropping it I became even more careful and “overprotective” when moving this bowl around.
When I have visions and I recognize the signs/symbols manifesting it fascinates me. Who wouldn’t be fascinated by being able to foresee events?!?!?! We all have at some point or another in our lives.
For example the other day when I was blessed with embracing an opportunity of being a background extra for a TV show for a second time.
When I embraced the opportunity of filming a few weeks ago, I “saw” that I would be filming something in a bar, well that wasn’t the case, I was outside looking at a building, so I just let it go and forgot about it.
Well the other day I received a call to film a scene and they said I would be a bar patron, I immediately was excited because that meant my vision was manifesting and then that means I truly am Psychic… Yes, I do doubt myself as a psychic…I really don’t like to say I can “predict” because of FREE will and choices and events that take place outside of us. Yet truth and fact is…… I have in the past predicted events happening in others lives.
And when it comes to foreseeing events in my own life, well there are levels that I believe include living a self-fulfilled prophecy. Being we are the co-creators and manifestos of our own life. “If you can see it you can achieve it.”
So here I am driving and I arrive to the location exactly like what I had foreseen. Even when I met my fellow co-extras, I recognized them but had never met them before. Again I was fascinated in wonderment because I had no idea what was next.
Then I saw this man, a crew member who I noticed on the first shoot because well…He is cute! cute! cute for One and I had a hunch I knew what his name was.
Well I found myself on this second shoot staring, I could not take my eyes off of him. I even knew what I was doing and how creepy it all seemed and I could not take my eyes off of him. Our eyes even caught each others….At least I think they did.
Well as he was standing I could see his name on his walkie talkie and OMG/ODDESS, I was correct his name is…….
Now many people would have told me to go talk to him. Well for One I am not that kind of guy, I feel very awkward and I am in a sense “new” to the whole talking to someone you’re interested in experience and I truly am “shy” at first……I know this is because I judge myself so much, remember I am transforming the beliefs of Ancient times past, so it takes time. For two it may not be considered “professional” when working as a background to talk to a crew member. We are given stick instruction to not talk to the actors or take photos…We are all there to do a job and be professional. “Professional” gets me a little confused and nutsy… Heck I probably wasn’t really professional to be staring like I was….hahahahahahaha oi
Thirdly, an almost 20 year relationship of many “labels” had just come to a close and I am so not ready to even begin dating. Let alone think about it, which I have and I have decided to just be with me for however long I need, especially because there is still so much baggage that I am left to untie from moons and suns of ancient past. However it is challenging when there have been so many people “predicting”, I will meet someone who respects, honors and supports me emotionally and I will be in love again….Right now my mindset is on doing this for myself….However the thought of being held, hugged and loved is blissful. That is truly all I ever want LOVE. Don’t we ALL?!?!?!
Anyway back to the experience….So as we are waiting to go on set and throughout the waiting process our gaze was in each others direction. He could have been thinking “OMG this freak is staring at me.” or “OMG is that, that psychic guy” or “He is so unprofessional for gawking at me like that…eeeewwww gross and he is dripping sweat.” And Yes, he could have been thinking “He is cute or HOT.”
It was 90 degrees out and we were in Fall cloths…..also to mention when I am in the zone, I sweat profusely..
So then he come closer by me talking to another crew member, that person leaves and he turns and looks at himself in the car window and starts grooming his hair.
Here I am wondering is he doing that to really check his hair? or is he doing that to check out my butt. Being I was standing right next to him and it was not a quick hair check. So what do I do?
I turn and see him brushing the sides of his hair forward and think to myself…Oh that’s cute…Oh he is so cute…Daved stop…Daved stop.
So then he gets called away and a few moments later is standing diagonally across from me, again catching the glances…Is it him or I? Who knows?
Then he comes over to me….OMG…OMG….OMG…..and says wait for it……wait for it….”Did someone tell you to hold that hoodie or put it on”…uuuuuuuummmmm OMG/OMG?OMG is how I was inside….yet my reply was…Yes, I am to put this on when I get inside over my jean shirt…He replied “Okay cool, I wanted to just check and make sure.”
Then we get called in, do the scene…only two takes….a quick in and out…yet there were some interesting experiences that took place with that however that is another blog for later….Is this even a blog? This story seems like it is going on forever…people have probably stopped reading by now…see how fear works….and here’s how I am transforming those fearful thoughts…Just keep typing…just keep typing and sharing the experience.
So after the scene the van takes us back to holding and I see him walking across the street to what seemed like where he may have been parked and think….Wow he got back here fast, before us and he already got his stuff. How is it we are here at the same time?
I wave to him and say.. ‘have a good night.’ In which he replied “you too”.
I went in get my stuff and walk back to the parking lot a couple blocks down…It took about 10-mins for me to get in the building, out and back down to the parking lot where the van had originally dropped us of at.
As I am walking to my Soul, a car is coming towards me and yes, it’s him driving, I wave….waves as I watch him pass me, he continues to drive what seemed to me ever sooooo slowly…While all the time I wondered “should I say something? What? What do I do?”
I did nothing except wonder…DANG IT!!! I got into my Soul and replayed the experience over and over in my head. From the vision and through all the manifestations….It always trips me out…In a fantabulous way yet none the less sometimes experiences can not fully come to BE out until the next event.
This writing started our speaking about breaking a bowl. So maybe you are wondering what does a bowl have to do with the crew guy or the filming? Well, as I wonder that myself…I come to the answer of… Me foreseeing the bowl and the filming is what inspired me to sit down and embrace the time to write about the experiences and share them on this page.
That bowl breaking had me feeling like I had failed and feeling like I had no purpose…..we managed to keep that bowl in tact for all these years and now I have the choice to keep a cracked bowl that is still functional or to let it go…The past several years have been about letting go…MY WHOLE LIFE has been about letting go….I’m tired of letting go! I’m tired of being left…I’m tired of saying I can’t put up with this….Hence the reason my whole life has been about letting go…When the experience of letting go occurs this does invite the belief of abandonment. It does not feel like LOVE when One feels abandoned nor does it feel like LOVE when One feels like they are abandoning.
In some levels I feel like I abandoned a responsibly of keeping this bowl in tact when I didn’t even but the bowl nor did I pick it out. Yet because it is been in my experience for ten plus years somehow it became my responsibility.
So for now the point of the vision of the bowl breaking got me to embrace time and write about what is within. The vision and the experience of the crew guy…well, I wrote about it and put it out to the Universe, maybe there will be a third meeting and if there is. I commit to talking to him and maybe even asking him out for coffee….maybe that’s to forward….maybe I’ll just ask him if he’s on facebook and if we could connect sometime….Who knows? Right now I set the Intention and commit to speaking with him, if there is a next time.
So if you are reading this….I want to ask you
What are you holding of from?
Is there somewhere you feel as though you are failing in your OWN Soul/Spirit/Human contract?
Truth is nothing is a failure because we are here!!!
Yet what are you hesitant in doing?
What if you did it? What if you didn’t wait? Imagine the possibilities…..and really what’s there to loose?
This is what I help my clients with and I am grateful because they Inspire me.
They Inspire me.
I have clients that were on the brink of divorce that are communicating and have re-ignited LOVE because they are doing the work….they are communicating.
I have clients that were afraid to share their voice and their story and are now published authors.
I have clients that were miserable in there “regular” jobs now living a successful “artistic/creative” career.
They Inspire me because if they CAN DO IT, so CAN I and….
There are many in the ALL of One and three are the key to the sum that equals One. Experiences of each are very unique within this space always held
in honor and grace. Sometimes I want to protect what resides in this chest and I have learned that would not be showing up in my best. Carried through the winds of time gazing into eyes vowed to LOVE from this place through the moons and suns times three so mote it BE, I LOVE thee through eternity.
© Daved Beck, 2013
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